But I've been thinking about speaking up, choosing your battles, that sort of thing.
I was part of a conversation earlier this week where another lady was talking at length about a philosophy that I happen to disagree with. There came a point where I could have thrown out a different perspective--nothing too confrontational--just a "have you thought about this?" kind of question.
{Sorry if this is on the vague side, but I don't want to get too specific on this one.}
Anyway, the opportunity came and went, and I didn't say anything. And it made me wonder if I was showing discretion or if I just wasn't being brave.
Clearly, you could spend all of your time arguing with those pesky political posts on Facebook or Twitter, and that's not healthy. Conversely, there are times when your convictions are so strong that you simply must add your perhaps brilliant perspective.
As usual, it's the gray areas that are problematic: discussion in Sunday school classes, a differing opinion by a higher-ranking person at work, family dinners {heaven help us!}.
The situation is still eating at me, so I thought I'd pose the question to all of you.
How do you decide when to speak up...or not?
I usually speak up and then regret it, or don't speak up and then regret it so I'm ready for some advice too!
ReplyDeleteI know! It is so tough to hit the right balance!
DeleteHaving had a dismal propensity for going off half-cocked in the past, ( Oh, I tried to convince myself that I was just a naturally passionate person.) I have over the course of many (I mean MANY) years (SLOWLY) learned to take the time to try to "read" the other person. 1. How receptive is he? 2. Will my speaking out make a concrete difference? 3. Would my silence imply that I concur/ Is my speaking out a need to flaunt what I consider my superior enlightenment, judgement, or position?
ReplyDeleteOn the spiritual front, even if the scriptures back up what I say, I must take the time to consider, "Is this God's timing or mine?" It IS possible to be right in the Spirit, but NOT in God's timing. In those cases, the scriptures become a battering ram, and the farthest thing from Christ's example ("A bruised reed He did not break.") Perhaps the Lord is just showing me someone's heart that I might quietly take some time with him and invite him out for a coffee or a lunch, and some conversation. Maybe I am merely meant to pray for that person.
I have also found it helpful to begin, "I find that very interesting. May I ask you what led you to that conclusion?" A good response, when suddenly asked to take sides, is to say, "I'd like some time to think about that. There are some other points I would have to consider." That response indicates that there ARE other points to consider, and can redirect the other person to take a second look. I suppose that what I've taken my usual too long a time to say is that one can always reintroduce a topic and speak out. But it is sometimes impossible to take back words spoken in haste.
These are wise words, indeed. I'm going to spend some time committing these questions to memory for when the situation comes up again. Thank you, Ms. Leah!
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